“What’s the easiest way to defeat an enemy?”
“To get it to defeat itself.”
We live in a society dominated by the patriarchy. Women and men living at a disadvantage because of archaic and outdated views. Fathers absent from their children’s lives because they are too busy earning a living. Mothers stuck at home because they can’t afford to work and pay childcare costs.
I thought times were changing, I thought the world was changing.
I thought that we were being freed from the stereotypes that plague us.
Every time I dare to think to think things are going in the right direction, there’s always something that will smack me in the face, making it blindingly obvious that, indeed, we are still living in the dark ages.
What is becoming clearer, is that the patriarchy seeks to keep us down by making us fight amongst our own ranks.
A perfect example came as I stumbled across a headline “Keira Knightley writes powerful letter and takes aim at Kate Middleton”.
Now I don’t know Keira Knightley, never met her in my life and didn’t even know that she had become a mother… but I had a feeling that she wouldn’t be so nasty as to ‘take aim’ at Kate Middleton.
So, I read on.
Then I looked at all the other headlines about the same story-
“Keira Knightley criticises Kate Middleton”
“Keira Knightley slams Kate Middleton”
“Keira Knightley blasts Kate Middleton”
I still wasn’t sold that this is what she had done.
So, I downloaded the book, in which this letter is published (unsurprisingly it was a book on feminism called ‘Feminists Don’t Wear Pink‘- the perfect thing to tear apart, the perfect thing to portray as creating woman on woman hatred).
I read the letter.
And then it all became clear.
This was no woman criticising, slamming or blasting another woman. This was a woman speaking up about the complete lack of respect our society has for birthing women, indeed for women in general. Speaking up about the sheer ignorance we have when it comes to the sacredness of the postpartum period.
She wasn’t ‘taking aim’ at Kate Middleton, she was sympathising for her and for all women, especially those that are not honoured during their time of becoming a mother.
But why does the media feel a need to play it out in this way? Why does the media need to act out this farce of women hating women?
Because if we were allowed to realise that we are all working towards one goal, if we were to focus all of our energy on helping this broken planet, rather than directing hated towards one another- then we might start to chip away at the patriarchal BS. We might start to bring about change- and that, my friends, is scary. Human beings don’t like change, regardless of whether it is for the best or not. We fear it and, so, we resist it.
It’s time we stopped it. It’s time we embraced the change. It’s time we all realised that working together to get out of this entangled web of the patriarchy will only see ourselves living happier, more fulfilled lives. It will only see our children living happier, more fulfilled lives- and isn’t that what this is really all about?
If you want to be a part of the change, if you want to work towards a society that respects mothers, that respects fathers, that respects YOU. Then come and join us at Do It Like A Mother- I’m taking a break from face-to face teaching in Upminster right now, I’m focussing my energies on bringing about change on a whole other level but there’s so much going on in Southend at our HQ- why not click over to the IG page to keep up-to-date or join us in one of our Facebook groups (Work Like A Mother and Do It Like A Mother(hood)- Pregnancy and Mum Life Community)? We’d LOVE to see you there!